Bittersweet Changes



A great Mothers Day with her two sons

When we set our sights on making this gigantic life change we knew it would not be easy. We did also consider that it my not be easy for our family members either. Although we had no doubt that everyone who loves us would always want us to pursue a life that made us happy. And to know me and Scott is to know that we are happiest when we are exploring opportunities on our terms. We rarely choose to follow the same path that everyone else is on, doing things in our own way is where we find the most joy!

Now we’re facing a bittersweet moment of change. Pat is moving to her own place. πŸ˜”πŸ˜Œ. Scott’s mother has been sharing our home for a little over a year now. Its been so much better than I could ever have imagined. When we originally started discussing the idea of Pat living with us I must admit, I was a little nervous . As, I’m certain she was as well. You really never know what could go wrong living with someone. And she had been living all by herself for many, many years, so it would surely be an adjustment for her as well as for us. I have always had a very nice relationship with my mother in law and I certainly hoped living together wouldn’t jeopardize that relationship. You’ll be glad to know that if living together affected our relationship it has only been for the better!

Let me just say as a side note for those of you who don’t know Pat. She didn’t move in with us because she couldn’t live on her own. She’s certainly far from being an old lady! Nooooo! She’s quite capable of living independently . She decided to sell her house which was becoming too much work for her to maintain and just rent something so she could create a less stressful, more simplified standard of living for herself. This way she would have more time and energy to pursue things she enjoys instead of the constant worry of a broken sprinkler or maintaining a huge garden, or keeping a big house clean and organized. Scott and I thought that living with us temporarily would be a good idea given the fact that her house sold much faster than we ever thought it would sell and she hadn’t found a new place to live quite yet. Also she has a very old dog, “Molly”, who is now a nearly 16 year old pooch, who Pat was certain was not long for this world,( Molly is proving that belief wrong!), making finding a nice place to rent a bit of a challenge . The three of us discussed the possibility and came up with an arrangement that we all felt good about. Believe me, we had to convince her, she at first was rather resistant to the idea.

It didn’t take long for us to get into a comfortable routine. We got her all set up with two bedrooms. One room was her living room with her sofa and her tv and her desk with her computer. The other room was her bedroom. And of course she had her private bathroom as well. So she had plenty of privacy . Our house is very open and spread out so there’s plenty of space for three people,( and two cats and a dog!) to comfortably co-habitate.

As we were getting her ,”all set up”, she was getting us, all organized! Boy did we need her help in that department ! Soon our house, mostly our kitchen was carefully organized and did I mention,’Clean’! Yes, if there’s one thing she excels in,( and there’s wayyyyy more than one thing she excels in!), it’s organizing and cleaning! And cleaning, and cleaning, and cleaning! Did I mention cleaning? Yep, I think she actually enjoys cleaning ! My poor house will never be as clean as when she’s here ! Damn! It was so nice! I do really appreciate having such a clean house, I have a hard time maintaining that level of consistent cleanliness ! It’s one of my many weaknesses! A domestic goddess has not been my life’s passion, of this I am certain. But please don’t think that my sparkly clean house has been the only reason I am sad to see Pat leave us! Noooooo, just having her around has really been pleasant. She’s great to chat with and eat with and occasionally have a nice refreshing mojito with. Spontaneous drives to Half Moon Bay to buy live crab for Scott to make crab cakes !!! And let’s not forget the constant knowledge that we would never run out of guacamole mix!!! Once Pat knows you like something she makes sure its there for you! Just ask the cats.( including our nieghbor cat, Jack!), and the hummingbirds. They are all now officially spoiled rotten! Thanks Pat!!!😝.

As I said, Bittersweet is the word I am calling this time. For all those previous reasons , I am sad to see her move. But…. She found a truly lovely pace to live. It’s near her best friend Joanne and her other son,( Scott’s brother) and daughter in law, Mike and DeeDee. Our home is about 30 minutes North of where she has lived most of her life. So she will be back in her old stomping grounds again which will suit her just fine. Familiar markets, her doctors, malls, etc. And , although Molly will surely miss my cats,( they will not miss her!) , she will be very comfortable in the new digs. That’s the Sweet part, it’s a really nice new home where I’m sure she’s going to settle in and be very happy.

Pats relocation has been one of the biggest changes yet to take place as a result of our impending international move. It’s a hard one, for sure. Not only hard for me but I know it’s a very sad thing for Pat. I know She’s really enjoyed her year with us. She will miss all the delicious dinners and the company. I think this year of living together has been a really great thing and even though it’s hard to see it end, I’m grateful for having had such a positive experience. And Scott and I both feel very fortunate to have gotten her all to ourselves for a whole year!!! Yes, moving Pat to her new home is truly bittersweet. But I’m not done trying to convince her to at least spend extended periods of time with us once we get ourselves all settled in Panama! I may have to fly out to California to personally drag her but she may just surprise us and tell us that she’s on her way! You just never know! 😌. One thing I do know, when I look back at this last year here I’ll always smile!


A Spontaneous Mojito Moment!


The Sweet Molly dog!


About hollycarter184

Life is Good! But it's time for a change, and more adventure! I'd like to share the whole experience of preparing then actually making a reality of expatriating, and moving to a new country. It's an exciting, and slightly scary move full of possibility . I'm looking forward to learning a new language and making new connections with the people who share our spirit of adventure. This blog is my way of continuing my connection with my friends and family in the States. Sooooo here it goes! :)

3 responses »

  1. This one made me sad and happy all at once 😦 πŸ™‚ I am so glad Pat, you & Scott had this past year getting to know each other and expiring those “Spontaneous Mojito Moment” πŸ™‚ Please tell Pat I am so happy for her and Molly’s new home. I am glad she is closer to her other Son and his family- I know they will be VERY HAPPY there πŸ™‚ I know you both will miss her however right now you can still go get her for “Spontaneous Mojito Moment” Love to all Mom xxxxxxoooooo

  2. It is generous of you to share you experiences in your blog so we readers can feel the ups and downs of each step of your transition. You are coming to a beautiful place, and we look forward to your arrival in Panama.

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