Yes, I miss you all terribly,

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I recently had a good friend in California tell me ,( tongue in cheek ) ” I’m tired of hearing about how much fun your having, and all the new friends your making, I want to hear about how lonely you are, and how much you miss US!” Awww….sigh.. Well, I have been very outspoken about all my new and exciting experiences and about all the new friends I’m making and interesting people I meet all the time here. I’m experiencing so many new sights, sounds and flavors with each new day. Although I’m very excited to share all that with all of you back home, I never really thought about the fact that some may like to know that I’m missing them. And that I think about them and sometimes I wish I were there with you, like you wish I were there with you. Soooo without getting too mushy and sounding like a total sap, here is where I tell everyone back in California who I left …. I miss you. I do, really miss everyone, terribly.

I know all the people who care about me most only wish me happiness in whatever form and whatever location calls to me. I have had nothing but well wishes from near and far and I’m well aware of how much all my peeps support me as I follow my path. So , here’s an interesting observation I have just kind of silently been thinking about and now I’m just putting it out there for all to see. If I had to pinpoint one aspect of this path that I have chosen that is the hardest for me, I think it would be the rebuilding of familiarity. I really thrive on familiarity and feeling as though I “belong”. Even though I’m meeting lot’s of really great people who I look forward to building friendships with, It will be a really long time before I have “old friends” here. I have no history with all these new people. Nobody knows me like you all do and sometimes thats kinda hard.

I spent some time this week catching up with a few friends in California and it was great to be able to use FaceTime to feel as though I were there with them. But It’s also a bit of a pull at my heart-strings when the call is over and the screen goes black. It’s been 68 days since I left California to make a new home in Panama. I’m still in the “Honeymoon” stage of this new and wondrous adventure. When I chat with Elisabeth we talk about each an every one of my friends who she now see’s as her clients. I ask her what she thinks of you (yes, I go through my list and ask her about every single person) and she is of course just head over heals overjoyed to be your new stylist and she feels so blessed to have inherited such an incredibly kind, genuine, friendly, and pleasant clientele.( I have pointed out the fact that we attract “like” people to our lives, so I must be pretty Damn awesome!) LOL! I know she’s looking forward to building the types of close relationships with all of you that I had the pleasure to have had and still hold onto from afar. I miss our regular interactions every 3 weeks or 4 weeks or 6 weeks and some every 8 weeks. Many for nearly 30 years!!!

I have to admit that after all those years of styling hair, I was beginning to feel pretty burnt out. (I know, it’s not something you want to know about the person cutting your hair!) I felt as though I had somehow “peaked” in my profession and had lost the passion I once had as a young stylist , just starting out. I was feeling as though I had lost my creative edge and had pretty much done all I could do . Don’t get me wrong, I loved my career until the very end but It was time for me to move on to my next chapter. The aspect of my career as a stylist that I never tired of and that I miss terribly( It was a huge part of “who” I am) was connecting with all the people every day. Talking and sharing and catching up on what went on in one another’s lives since the last time you sat in my chair. This part of what I did for 30 years was the part that was rewarding beyond words and the part I never got tired of. And that is the part of my life in Los ALtos that I miss terribly. Some days my heart aches when I think of all the people that I miss. So, yes, I am making lot’s of new friends and meeting so many interesting and wonderful new people here in Boquete, but alas, it doesn’t stop the ache of missing all those who know me so well.

It’s hard to stay in touch and the sad reality is that although many will make the effort , there will be some who will , naturally , just kind of fade away. Sad, but true. I hope my blog helps to keep me, at least somehow, connected to all my friends. And FaceTime and Skype are a magnificent means of communicating from afar(Hint Hint, to those of you who have neglected to venture into Skyping or Facetiming!) . So, for those of you who are wondering if I’m missing all my friends there in California, YES, I miss you terribly. Sigh! But, you all know that I’ve never been one to focus on the negative, I much prefer to continue telling you all about all the great, wonderful, new people and experiences I’m having here in my new home. Besides, It’s way more fun to read about and this is , after all, a blog about an Adventure, right?! So, now that we have established that we all miss each other, let’s get this Adventure goin’ again shall we?!!

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About hollycarter184

Life is Good! But it's time for a change, and more adventure! I'd like to share the whole experience of preparing then actually making a reality of expatriating, and moving to a new country. It's an exciting, and slightly scary move full of possibility . I'm looking forward to learning a new language and making new connections with the people who share our spirit of adventure. This blog is my way of continuing my connection with my friends and family in the States. Sooooo here it goes! :)

5 responses »

  1. Miss seeing you to chat face to face but feel so connected with your blog! Glad you are settling in with a vengeance! Life is an adventure whatever your location. Es verdad!

  2. Very nice post, Holly. I especially like the part about breeding familiarity. Sometimes, I’d just like to hand out a 3X5 notecard that tells who I am, where I’m from, and what I’m doing in Nicaragua. It’s exhausting and challenging to sum up a lifetime of experiences when making new friends and sharing tales with old friends. Poco a poco.

  3. The thing about long term friends is that when you see each other again it seems you have never parted. Look me up on Skype under name ..LOL

  4. Exactly what Elaine posted. True, long term friends (and just true friends, in general) will always be there for you even if you don’t “see” them for a long time. Even here in the States, I haven’t seen some old best friends forever (!), but then when we do get in touch, it’s like no time has passed between us. It’s hard to move forward, changing your life the way you and Scott have, but the rewards are fantastic and great friends understand why the changes have been made and will make the commitment to stay true to you. Everyone has to live their lives the way they choose and basically just live for the day, because who knows what will happen tomorrow!

    • Oh Allison! Thank you so much for such kind and encouraging words. Can you tell I kinda needed to hear that? Leaving all those wonderful people and hoping that someday I’ll have developed similar connections is sometimes not easy. But yes, you are right, those true, good friends will never leave, no matter the distance between us! Cheers Mi Amiga!

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